the message

What’s complicated and why does it hurt?

- It’s when you don’t know where you stand in a person’s life; it’s when you’re hanging in dead air and knowing you can be thrown off anytime. It’s when you’re like more than friends but not really, nd it’s like you’re lovers when it’s really otherwise. Darn it. Sometimes you would want to wish to have never met the person at all but at the back of your mind, you’re thankful you have. >hmmm… wondering why I post this one? Because:

1. This message had stayed on my phone for almost a year.

2. When I sent this message to everyone on my list, many had reacted and hahaha… it hit them, I know. (you know, people are in denial almost always)

3. it’s a message for everyone!

giving up my pride

this was a very blessed day. well, everyday is a blessing but this one is different. it was a relief after a week of no pansinay and talking. this morning, me and monet had our weekly jogging to the rotonda and we had our rest in my old home- the creepy -no light apartment. my classes would start at 9:00 am and so i decided to have my shower there since there are still clothes left in my cabinet. monet left after 5 minutes and i heard someone opened the main door and i know it was kuya lloyd. we'd never talk for weeks because of something i had done which made him upset. he misunderstood everything. i don't want him to be in trouble. it was also for his own good. i thought he's already grown-up and understand why i'd done such a thing but it was the other way around. he never talked to me and that's why i moved here in the abao's place. te chang and monet knows that i can't afford not to talk to someone for a very long time. it was just a little tiny situation and i don't want to ruin our relationship just because of that. so while i was taking my shower, i was thinking of something to open up just to break the great mood of silence between me and him. so after my shower, I TALKED TO HIM. it was awkward at first because i don't know if he would listen or respond. but i just eat my pride and start the conversation. i was glad he responded. i know he also can't resist of not talking to me. i'm glad we're fine and i'm still hoping we could have the same bonding we had before. and also i'm still hoping he would understand everything that had happened.

hope everything will be okay kuya.

back in each other's arms

"and now were back together. together.."last night, we went to divisoria to relax and just want to have our attendance checked.. hehehe.. i had no plans of going to the apartment or what.. when we were already there.. roaming around the overcrowded night cafe, i receive a text message and it was from kuya lloyd.. i was shocked because as what i'd said.. it has been a week that we'd never talked and even communicate.. so i was surprised.. and i wanna cry because he said..."marms... sorry ha?"huhuhu.. and that begins the reunited relationship of yuson cousinship... awh... hehehe

so, monet helped me in giving him a peace offering.. it was awkward and unusual for me... and i really don't know what to do... thank God monet was there...and the night and the long week of silence end up with a great big hug...love you kuya..

questions

why do people change when they get into a relationship?

do they change for their own good? or because their partner want to?
based on my experience and my observations to other people.they would really change and forget their old self. they will try to complement to what their partner want them to be. why do they have to change? for in the first place, they were attracted and had loved the person you used to be. the real you...

and in the midst of the seemed-to-be-a-perfect-relationship you both dreamed of. enjoying each other's company..feeling the sweet aroma of love. you'll eventually forget the person you used to be as well as the people who loved you from the very beginning. who knew the real you. and what's worse? you'll ignore their concern and try to believe that "love will conquer all".

but when the heaven and earth would clashed. everything between you and your partner was over. you'll end up to those people you had left behind. those are the TRUE FRIENDS. you'll be depressed. and trying to recover. but the difficult thing is. you don't know how to because you don't know the whole you. you were totally different. you'll try to go back to your old self but then memories woulod hunt you and you'll regret everything.

it's a cliche story i know but then everything was so true.

admit it.. ayt? :-)